Time to come clean.
I’m having a love affair, and it’s been going on for several years.
It started reluctantly at first, since it was unlike anything I’d ever experienced. My husband actually encouraged it. It took a while to get used to. It wasn’t exciting, or thrilling, or any of those adjectives I was promised at the beginning, when this whole arrangement went down.
I didn’t give up. I knew we had a long future together, her (yes, her) and I. I persevered.
It only took me a month to start to enjoy it. Then, I started to crave it. I looked for excuses to be with her. We spent a lot of time together. We still do, but not as much anymore.
She’s the best. She loves my singing, and constantly tells me that I sound like Adele. She’s always got a tissue handy for me to dry my tears. She just….gets me. I can’t explain it. She knows when I need to go fast or to take it slow. She lets me control the temperature and never ever complains about my moods, or if I slam stuff around. It has taken very little to keep her happy over the years.
She makes me feel powerful, and in control. She’s everything I want and nothing I don’t. She’s gotten me out of tough situations. She’s met my daughter and they seem to get along well, as she’s been fairly tolerant of her toddler messes.
Those who know of our love affair have gently encouraged me lately to let her go, move on with my life. I can’t. I’m too in love. She gets better with age.
I’ve started seeing someone new lately. He (yes, I consider my new love a he) is shiny and gleams in the sun and is full of bells and whistles, even to the point where I get frustrated, angry even, because I don’t have the patience to deal. He’s fun, but I don’t love him. He’s complicated. He’s fancy and technical and quite honestly, sometimes headache inducing. He’s just not the same.
I revisit my old love sporadically, just because I miss her. It will be a hard day for me when circumstances push us away forever.
Today was a fun day, though, because I knew she and I were going to have a celebration. I took her out for a spin. I snapped this pic.
I’m sure this sort of love isn’t a huge deal for most, and this milestone is hit every day for many, but today my girl and I celebrate in the rain, running an errand in Radnor, just the two of us, cruising around like old times.