Ever see those things like “Questions To Ask Each Other Before You’re Married?” Yeah, me too. The other night, as we were laying around doing nothing, I came across a questionnaire online and asked Noah if he wanted to play along.
After the second or third question, we stopped- partly because we already knew each other’s answers, but partly because not every question could be answered easily and I wasn’t looking to have a gigantic discussion at 7pm when no one had even mentioned dinner yet. Is it important to know if you want children, or what religion you want to raise them, or whether or not you believe in an afterlife? Yes, and you should make sure that you know some of these answers prior to tying the knot. But people change their minds, and their goals, and their perspectives. What your answers may be at a young, 24 year old with eyes wide open may not be the same when you’re a tired, jaded, worn out 48 year old. So, the question shouldn’t be “do you want to have children?” but instead “if we go through fertility treatments and money and a miscarriage and a stillbirth and then more infertility and money and grief and loss and anger and sadness and a little more anger and sadness, do you still want to be married to me in spite of it all?”
Take these quizzes with a grain of salt. You should generally be on the same page, but expect those pages to turn, and, if they do, do you still want to keep reading the book?
Oh, one more thing- two MAJOR questions that were omitted- how many ice cubes should you leave in the tray before you fill it up again? Who is going to set the mousetraps or get the dead snake out of the garage?
Copyright 2014 Anne Mathay