I’m in the middle of one of the worst breakups I’ve experienced so far in life. It’s so bad that I caved and called my mom and pretty much sobbed to her during my entire 45 minute ride to work today.
No, not my marriage. Not a friendship. I’m talking about my obstetrician.
Like most women, I swear my OB is the best out there. But, he really is. To have gone into the hospital knowing my son would be born and not breathing, being in labor, and then, almost 24 hours later, finally getting the C-section that I so badly wanted under the circumstances, he was there when I needed him. His compassion, and kindness, and humanity made me survive that day, and his genuine interest in me as a mother who has lost and a mother who struggles with infertility is mind blowing.
I know I’m not the only patient who has broken up with her doctor. People do it all the time, and a lot of us do it because of changing health insurance. In a perfect world, we’d never have changes in providers of any kind unless it is on our terms. My mom gently pointed out to me today that people follow their hairdressers, even if it means paying more at a different salon and hiking across town during rush hour. I’d drive to Idaho (seriously) for my doctor, but I don’t have a choice anymore.
So, my affair has ended, and the other woman is Independence Blue Cross. As we have to switch health insurance on September 1, I need to prefect my “it’s not you, it’s me” speech and find a new doctor.
I’ve got a great recommendation for a new doctor, and the practice is much closer to my house with evening hours- but this would mean (if I were to get pregnant again) seeing a new Maternal and Fetal Medicine specialist, and -gasp!- delivering at a new hospital. I’m trying to look at this as a good thing. Even though I’m leaving my comfort zone, newness can be good, right? Maybe a fresh start will bring new luck for me?
As much as I want to sit on the couch and glug down Savignon Blanc and cram spoonfuls of Chunky Monkey into my mouth over this, I’ll go to yoga, I’ll come home and vacuum my upstairs, I’ll make sure all of the trash cans are emptied for our pickup tomorrow. My heart will go on.
Copyright 2014 Anne Mathay